In Case you didn't know
by LTMGreyCastle
Summary: Post Series... Late night confession.


It was a slow day and Cal was slouched into his chair, feet propped on his desk, with music playing softly in the background. Lost in thought and staring towards a photo on his desk, he didn't hear the distinctive click of her heels coming down the hallway. She surprised him with " _Cal_ , the meeting" and he looked up to see her leaning through his doorway. His quickly masked surprise was meet with her exasperated-but-I'll-play-along look, assuming he was purposely trying to be late.

"What, love?" he murmured, more softly than she expected. " _did she hear a hint of something deeper in his tone?" she wondered._

As she walked towards him, Cal sprung into action quickly stopping the music. As she placed the file on his desk, his feet fell to the floor. "Where were you Cal?" she asked with soft concern, catching the briefest moment of his music.

"I'm right here, Gill. Lets go to that meeting, yeah?" He stood and slung his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close. She startled a little at the contact, but as they walked out the door he felt her snuggle just a little tighter. And as her perfume gently filled senses he felt his world align.

A few steps from his doorway, Gill realized she had left the accounts folder on Cal's desk and stopped suddenly.

"Gillian?" Cal question

"I left the folder on your desk, and I wanted to grab some hot chocolate before the meeting." She softly whined.

"Grab the folder, I'll grab the drinks, luv," he murmured in her ear and let his arm slide down to the small of her back before letting her go.

She blushed, smiled at him, then turned and headed back to his office. As she walked through the door, the distinct scent of Cal hit her and she found herself smiling. He had been so sweet lately, and she so loved this Cal. Well, if she was honest with herself, she loved almost all the versions of him, but this one especially.

She picked up the folder, which hit the picture frame he had been staring at earlier, and toppled it over. Reaching out to set up the picture frame, she glanced at the photo. It was one Emily had taken of the two of them and they both had framed copies from Emily in their respective offices. They had fallen asleep while watching a movie one night. Gill had her head on his shoulder snuggled up under his chin, hand resting over his heart while Cal's left arm wrapped around her and held her close.

* * *

After that bloody boring meeting, Cal slung himself onto his couch. His thoughts returning to the running commentary in his mind; ever since the infamous conversation with Emily, his brain, or perhaps his heart, just couldn't let it go…

" _What are you waiting for?"_ He honestly didn't know. He was trying to figure out to move forward, if Gill would want that. She was his blind spot after all, but he'd noticed since confessing to Emily, he'd been able to read Gill better lately, and vice versa. And if he was reading her right…

He was foolish to want her. _"I don't deserve her. Special, that one."_ She had stuck by him through thick and thin the past 9 yrs. Hell, the past year especially, the shit he had put her though… She hadn't left him. As hard as he pushed, she stood there and pushed back.

Perhaps, she was just as foolish to want him too...

* * *

As if the unfamiliar song from Cal's office swirling around the edges of brain weren't enough distraction, she had an uneasy feeling about the way Cal was acting the past few days. She could hardly concentrate on payroll for all of it. _"Enough!"_ Gil thought.

Leaning back in chair, closing her eyes on a sigh, thoughts turning to Cal. Something must have happened a few days ago after they talked on couch with Claire's necklace. He'd been distant since then; pulling away yet simultaneously staying close. Around her but not crowding in her space, stealing her oxygen like he usually did. He wasn't pushing her buttons just to get a reaction, to see her smile. It was eerily familiar to when she had just started seeing Dave… before she told him and he had become as openly hostile as his mask would allow.

But then today, when he just pulled her close on the way to the meeting… She could have sworn she heard in voice what she had only heard when he talked to Emily: _Love._ And it made her heart squeeze and gave her hope that the future she wanted might be within reach.

If Claire's death had re-enforced anything to her, it was life was short. With that thought, Gil stood up and went to find Cal.

* * *

"Cal, wake up." He woke up slowly, to find Gil's hand on his upper arms, smoky blue colored eyes with an expression he couldn't quite sleepily read – scared with a hint of love maybe?

"What, love?" His response an echo from earlier as his sleep filled eyes met hers. Then his warm honey colored hazel eyes, moved slowly down her body as she sat on the coffee table across from him. "You're even better in real life, darling," he murmurs.

Gillian found herself blushing. " _Hear we go again,"_ she thought, back to a close-and-heated Cal. Unable to pull her hand away from his arm, she slowly slid it down to his hand and held on while she softly murmured, "We need to talk Cal. I need to know what's going on with you. Why you've been pulling away…"

Before he could open his mouth, she turned away and tried to stand up. In a flash, Cal reached out his left hand and grabbed her hand, pulled her down to sit next to him on the couch. "Look at me, Gil. Where did that accusation come from?" He gently spoke, hoping she heard his confusion and a hint of love, as he reached out, brushed her hair behind her ear with his right hand before letting his fingers drift down under her chin to tilt her head to meet his eyes.

"Gil… what's going on?" he murmured as her eyes meet his and he read sadness, hope, and… love _(Love?)_ on her face. He felt his heart simultaneous swell and squeeze with what he saw, and said "You wanted to talk, talk."

Suddenly shy, after the surge of confidence that brought her here, Gil found herself having trouble finding her words. "Cal, I, We…" She fumbled.

"I'm no mind reader, yeah? You're the word expert, love. Is this about Claire? Do you need some time?" Cal started, trying to curb his nervous fidgeting, trying to be there for her.

"No, Cal. Not Claire, but us. I need to talk about us." She said and nervously started to chew on her lower lip. Noticing they were still holding hands, she gave his a squeeze for courage and continued. "You seem to be pulling away, there but not quite. Not like the past few weeks; I love how we've been since Claire. It makes me sad that it took that to bring us back together, but we've been back to us. And now you're acting different. And I… I just cant." Her voice broke on a sob, she pulled her hand out of his, and turn away.

"Gil…" Voice desperate, Cal tried to catch up. _Can't what? Can't be here? Be around me? Can't Love me?!_ "Love, talk to me." Gill shrugged his hand off her shoulder, and shook her head. He could hear her breathing and tell she was trying to compose herself.

As Cal flopped back on to the couch, confused and concerned, unsure of the next step - of how to fix this, how to help her. She softly mumbled, voice forlorn (yeah, he could hear that in _her_ voice), "I can't lose you, Cal. I can't handle another post-Dave fallout. I wont survive that." And with that, she turned and looked at him. Just leveled him and gutted his heart with the absolute look of despair she showed him. Read that just fine, he did; thought he might be seeing something else under it too, just couldn't quite read that one.

He sat up, took his left hand ran it up her arm to behind her neck, and leaned forward, murmuring against her temple as he gave it a kiss, "Not going anywhere Gil. You're stuck with me. Feel sorry for ya, for that." He gave a wry smile and leaned back into the couch. Unsure what to say and sighed. They sat there for a few moments, studying each other, trying to read the unsaid. Cal smirked, opened his arms, and said, "Come here, love." Gil continued to stare; to try and see through his mask then suddenly satisfied that he understood her, snuggled down into his embrace, head resting on his shoulder, and his arms enfolded her. She smiled as she thought of the picture on his desk and the familiar pose.

Cal smiled when he felt her smile, just enjoying holding her. As her perfume wafted around him, " _God how did she still smell so good after working all day?"_ he thought. All of a sudden he heard himself say, "Had a conversation with Em a few days ago. Can't seem to stop thinking about it."

She turned her head, resting her chin on his shoulder to look at him, "Hmmm?" Wait, what is that she just saw, was he nervous? "What did you all talk about?"

" _In for a penny, in for a pound,"_ he thought. "You love," He said as his arms tightened holding her in place. "Told her something I should have told you first," he paused meet her eyes, tried to drop his mask (and hoped like hell he succeed in showing her), and continued, "Its your truth, just cant seem to find the words. Ya know me and words; I'm better with faces." Still couldn't quite read her, but he didn't see anything negative on her beautiful face. Just saw Gil, eyes bright, smiling at him.

"Hold on a minute love."

He stood, walked over to his computer, clicked his mouse a few times, then music started playing. Walking back over to her, he reached out his hand, "Dance with me, love?"

She placed her right hand in his left and he pulled her close. His right arm wrapped around her and settling at the small of her back; right at that place he had claimed as his own years ago. Clasped hands brought to his chest and he rested his cheek against hers. As she recognized the song from his office earlier, she slowly played with the hair at the nape of his neck, and he softly sang the chorus in her ear,"

" _In case you didn't know_

 _Baby I'm crazy bout you_

 _And I would be lying if I said_

 _That I could live this life without you_

 _Even though I don't tell you all the time_

 _You had my heart a long long time ago_

 _In case you didn't know"_

They continued to dance and Cal intermittently sang along and as the song finished, he pulled back and looked at her. Read her this time he did, and all he saw was love. "I love you, Gil. That's what I should have told you first. I. Love. You," He said, voice gravelly and soft, and she finally placed that tone of his voice she had heard through out the years. She wouldn't forget that tone, or the look on his face. "I know I don't deserve -" he started but was cut off but a well placed finger on his lips.

Tears glistening in her eyes, she whispered, "Cal." Stretching his name out, infusing it full of wanting and love. Said it in a way he always wanted to hear it. Then she said the words he never thought he would hear, "I love you too, Cal." Then she leaned in, softly placed a kiss on his lips, pulled back and whispered, "Take me home, Cal."


End file.
